Index of Thoughts

Friday, February 7, 2014

Saying Sorry

One of my New Year's resolutions was to stop saying Sorry.

It's such a hard thing to get out of the habit of doing.  Why do we say sorry when we aren't?  I think women have a much harder time with this.  I have decided to stop saying sorry to myself, my kids, my husband, my friends and family.  

My girls will ask me to have or do something.  Instead of saying "No, Sorry", I am apathetic with them but it's not negotiable and I'm not sorry about it.  I did read some great parenting advice once that suggested you make an appointment with your kids at an appropriate time and place where they have 5 minutes to discuss their side of things.  I really liked this approach.  This way they are heard and it's not making a whole scene when they don't get their way.  

With my husband I noticed that sometimes I can't please everyone's taste buds at dinner time.  Andy doesn't like poultry.  When I make a chicken dish, I don't tell him sorry anymore.  I make some suggestions for alternative dinner ideas that's in our fridge or I tell him better luck tomorrow night.  But, I'm not sorry so I'm not going to say it.

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When my girlfriends ask me to go do something and I'm not able to, I take a raincheck or reschedule a time that works for the both of us.  But, I stopped saying sorry.  I am pretty sure they don't need or want an apology.  So, why has this word been so ingrained in our thoughts and speech?  It's just a nasty habit that has spilled over time to the next generation of women.  Let's stop it now!

When should I say Sorry?

-when you are wrong
-if you hurt someone
-if you are compassionate for someone's pain

Those are the only reasons that I could come up with.  

Here are some reasons why you shouldn't say your sorry.

-standing up for yourself
-speaking your mind
-telling your feelings
-being yourself
-having a good time
-not having a good time
-not having time or being available
-making your own decisions
-just not feeling like it
-loving yourself

There are way more reasons why you shouldn't say sorry then why you should.  Let's all stop it.  Let's all change our words.  

You aren't sorry so Don't say it.  


  1. I agree, generally, that we apologize all too often for things that don't require an apology, but there are a couple of other connotations of the word that I think are appropriate. "... feeling or expressing pity, sympathy, remorse, grief, or regret..." "I'm sorry for your loss" being one example.

    1. Thanks Paula! You are so right. I forgot that one. I will revise it above.


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