Index of Thoughts

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Vulnerability, Me & You

This weekend is our first Three Graces' weekend event themed Awakening.  Three Graces is a new community outreach organization that me and two other inspirational girlfriends has started here.  It's about building community and connection and awareness within women of all ages.  We have all kinds of monthly gatherings planned to help bring us all together.  I am so excited about our first one.   We have had a huge response from the women that I have spoken to about it.  It's going to be filled with tears, joys, love, new friendships and a hug to my soul.

But, there's that lingering fear about it as well from women in our community as well as the world.  Last night we asked on our Three Graces' Facebook page about the word: vulnerable.  The knee jerk response is Weak.  I even asked my husband and he replied the same.  Everyone wants a place like this in their community and in their own lives except fear seems to hold some ladies back.  I pray that as time goes on that more and more women will come and we can all be vulnerable in order to heal us all. 

I also really want to bridge the gap in generations in our society.  Everyone needs a mother and a grandmother even if they aren't blood related.  Someone who you feel like you can crawl up into their warm, loving lap, and they will rock you and tell you that it's all going to be okay.  To tell you that this is the way, this has happened to her, to her mother, to her mother, and so on.  What would this mean to you?

It's not an easy thing to put yourself out there to a group of women that you barely know.  
It's hard to have the time or energy that it takes to expose your emotions.  
It's hard to feel rejected.  
It's hard opening up that dusty box of memories that has been doing just fine on that shelf in your heart.
It's hard to feel powerless.
It's just hard.

I've personally never Fully struggled with being vulnerable but, I have felt the overwhelming consequences of it.  I have been betrayed, rejected and felt worthless from being completely blinded by love, hurt by other women's words, death and just being open to life's pain.  I choose to go back out there fully exposed because I guess that's just who I am.  I'm more of the open book kinda girl, and I typically say what's on my mind. Sometimes I even say the wrong thing. I'm also the girl who seems the last to know and so naive to situations.  I've even had a friend say that she's never had a friend that reveals as much as I do.  At first I was a little hurt by that but then I decided to embrace it.  I know that I have emotional-whore tendencies but I am learning to put a leash on it.  But, as soon as I share something, I typically feel so much better. I just don't want to leave the icky feeling on the other person.  **This is me being vulnerable here.**

I love people, and I even love their flaws.  I love the amazing people in my life and even the ones that have hurt me.  I have decided to see them in a positive way.  Don't get me wrong -  I am definitely not naming my kids after them, not even my dog.  I just feel that the power and the rewards that I have experienced from being vulnerable have brought me here to this place.  To rebuilding a better marriage.  To letting things go.  To writing this blog.  To forgiving.  To creating a simpler life.  To slowing down.  To connecting with amazing women.  To opening Three Graces.  It is a time of Thanks indeed.

I hope you might join us one month at Three Graces and laugh, cry, connect and {hug} your own soul.  I pray that one day you open yourself up, dust yourself off, do something extraordinary, love yourself, be silly in front of others, tell someone that you think that you are beautiful, tell your child that you did something horrible one time, create new habits, rekindle an old hobby/passion, or even just journal your thoughts.

I will close with the thought from one our Three Graces' instructors, Shawna.  I love that she told me in her own vulnerability that every time she ends a Bodyflow class, she says this word below and she feels overwhelmed with love.   So with much love also in my heart and wiping a tear from the edge of my eye.


No comments:

Post a Comment

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...